i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Found the puke drawer
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
