they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
