I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Randomize
