that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
