My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
