Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
