Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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