the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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