Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
