I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize