I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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