Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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