I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
