What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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