Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
