need another drink. this is the easiest way
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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