We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
why do cheetos always look like penises
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
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Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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