will power is for people who don't want to get laid
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
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