when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
