Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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