Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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