Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Can vaginas get frostbite?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
