why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize