singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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