I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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