Someone shit on the floor
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
