That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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