THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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