she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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