I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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