We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize