dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
