i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
