Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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