This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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