Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
