Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
