just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
The dick lei will go down in squad history
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
