ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Randomize
