I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize