you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
