You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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