Already got asked if we're dating
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize