I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
