my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
