I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize