There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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