This girl is more easily done than said...
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
