the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I am puke
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
