hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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